Thursday, January 10, 2019

Finding Your Strength As A Sub

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Beastpup:



A sub is not a weak person.

I’m still meeting people that struggle with this concept. You’re a submissive. Passive. Someone who wants to be taken advantage of. No backbone. No strength. You are big but you are weak willed.

Nothing could be further from the truth. I am a sub – have embraced being a submissive – because I have a motivation deep down to make others happy. And I’m really happiest when I can submit to someone I admire and put their happiness at the centre of my being, my purpose. But submitting is still my choice. My willpower is my own and has driven me to achieve many things. Because I want to make others happy I shoulder burdens that would crush other people. I live, I work, I serve, I don’t typically complain. I am strong, and I know other subs who are strong, who have endured much to be the wonderful people they are today. A sub is not a weak person.

And yet, it is possible for us to be vulnerable.

You become vulnerable through the act of giving, submitting to your Master (or Sir, or Daddy, whatever your chosen title). It’s a wonderful thing, this giving, this way in which you put your trust in another that transcends the boundaries of a traditional partnership. You’re completely open and bare to all emotion, all feeling, and yet through this openness the purest expression of love, loyalty and devotion becomes evident and felt. Call it subspace. Call it what you will. But when you open your existence to this feeling, there’s no going back.

It’s perfectly possible – encouraged – to become dependent on the Master. He loves you, pushes you to be the best you can be, a touchstone of your existence, everything geared towards serving him, ensuring his happiness… and through that dependency is vulnerability. That is the conscious choice that is made. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Being dependent guarantees that should you be released from the Master, or should he step away… yes, you start to crumble. There’s suddenly a hole in the day that no other person can fill. Surety gives way to doubt. Thoughts become clouded. Suddenly, you realise, you’re having to stand alone.

I woke up this morning feeling weak, vulnerable, feeling oppressed by absences and work stress and diet anxiety and everything that facing the day would entail. I shared some gripes with someone I was close to, I spent a few minutes moping – and then I got up, and I found my strength again.

So where does a sub find his strength?

He finds it in the reason he ever wanted to serve in the first place; to be worthy. To make someone happy. In knowing that should he fail and fall, everything would have been for nothing. Means nothing. My strength is my promise to always give more, be more, grow more, to one day be worthy of a collar. My strength is my love. My strength is my submission. Even walking alone, that is what I have now - a pup heart beating hard, driving me onwards in purpose. Life can be a trial; waiting more so. But a sub that is strong and keeps their head held high can achieve many things.

My strength as a sub is inside. I know where it lives now, and I won’t let it go.

- Beast

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