The Profound Effect Of Total Isolation

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masteredwardsslave: i wrote that Master put me in isolation for several days over the new year and that the effects on me were profound. It has taken me a few days to be able to put down in writing my thoughts about this experience.

Master first covered my eyes with a mask, and then He put this heavy leather hood over my entire head. There were holes that enabled me to breathe, but no other openings in the hood. He laced the hood tightly up the back of my head. i could see nothing, hear nothing. i wore nothing else (except my chastity device) but i was placed in rope bondage and was pretty much immobile. The bondage was undone from time to time and i was led to a toilet to do my thing, after which, i was retied in a different position.

Periodically, Master (i believe it was Master) would open a small flap at my mouth and insert a plastic straw. He would say nothing, but i assumed i was to drink and i would drink water (it was always pure, cool water) through the straw until He withdrew the straw and closed the mouth flap back up.

i was given no food, and this led to my first revelation. There is no meaningful sense of time when you can neither see nor hear no feel anything. i sensed i was in bondage for a long time — i estimated a day — and i was shocked when the hood was removed and i learned it was three days later; but after a while i was hungry. The hunger grew and became pretty serious.

 Then i thought to myself: “He wants me to do this. He wants me to understand His power. He wants me to focus on Him and His need to have His way with me.” The more i thought these things, the less i noticed my hunger, and after i while i simply was not hungry any more. my mind was totally occupied with Master. 

i was going over every aspect of His behavior; replaying in my mind’s eye His every move in a day, His every statement, His every thought, and thinking to myself of every possible way in which i could react with Him to enhance His life, satisfy His needs, increase the joy of living for Him. my mind was so full of Master that there was no room in it for my hunger. i learned that my physical need — in this case for food — was mostly an emotional and intellectual need that paled in importance to me when compared with Master’s needs and wants.

It was the same thing with pain. Every time Master untied me and i had done my thing at the toilet, He retied me in a different position. Some were extreme, often involving spreader bars, or bent over backwards positions, or tying my genitals to other parts of my body so that any movement of my leg, say or my toe, would result in pulling on my genitals. 

There was extreme discomfort and frequently, pain. But after a while the pain was meaningless; my mind was so filled with thoughts of Master that the pain my body was enduring didn’t even register. i learned that in a life filled with Master, there is no pain, only the joy of service.

Master was extraordinary when He finally removed the hood. First He untied me, and then He helped me to a kneeling position. Then He untied the hood and removed it. The room was almost completely dark — just a faint light coming from a lamp that had been shaded, so that its light was indirect. i knelt there, staring up at Him and tears came to my eyes. i broke one of His rules and spoke without first being addressed. 

“Thank You Sir,” was all i said. And i wept. i bent over and kissed His boots, and He bent over and raised me up so that i was standing before me. He kissed me — for the first time ever — and wrapped His arms around me. Neither of us said anything as we stood there, embracing. But i knew that my life had changed, and that i would never again be the man i had been only three days previous.