What Are The Top 6 Traits You Desire In Your Ultimate Ideal Sub?

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Anonymous: What are the top 6 traits you desire in your ultimate ideal sub? 

Unknown Author:

1. An interesting human being. Lately I’ve come to a very defined point when it comes to my own interactions with someone I’m attracted to. There has to be something there. It cannot be all physical attraction. The gears must turn. There has to be passion for something Beyond sex. A drive to make the world better. An interest in a vocation. The desire to learn. The unequivocal Wanderlust.

2. Acceptance of what you want. I’m not saying you have to figure it out everything. There’s plenty to explore. But I want you to know that you want something. I don’t want to force you. I don’t want you to fake it. I don’t want you to pretend. I want you to love what I love.

3. An understanding of the line between fantasy and reality. This is perhaps the greatest problem of the internet age. Tumblr. Grindr. Recon. You have to know what is pretend and what is real. Know that someone cannot be submissive 24/7 nor can they be dominant for just as long. Know that there’s a time and a place for everything.

4. Embrace Humanity. A boy is not an object to me. He is a person. He’s a beautiful being. He deserves my respect. I will not dehumanize you. I will still do all the things you desire including humiliation play. But I cannot use you and toss you away. To this end, I say there’s just as much joy and fucking while you’re tied to the bed as there is going to Dairy Queen and getting a Cherry dipped cone.

5. Offer and accept affection. I can’t tell you how many times people have told me that I don’t look the part of a dominant man. I look too sweet. I look too innocent. I have a fire deep in my heart that comes out in the passionate form of restraints and control. But I do like to feel another person. I want to touch you. I want to be close to you. I want to kiss you. I want to embrace you.

6. Have personal Drive. I don’t want to be your sugar daddy. I don’t want you to be lazy. I don’t want you to live an unfulfilled life. I want you to pursue your dreams. I want you to follow a career that makes you happy. I want you to embrace the intellectual abilities that you have and partner them with my own so that we can both attain our joy in our professional lives. Money doesn’t have to be everything. You could want to change the world. And I’ll still hold your hand. I just want you to want something more.

*Prologue*

The most striking part of this list to me is that it still has not been obtained. Perhaps I’m too selective. Perhaps I ask too much. I’m a good man with a good heart and an extensive gear collection. I want to be happy. I hope I can find it.

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Here are the things I look for:

1. Before all else, we must connect as people. He has to be the kind of person I want to have as a friend.

2. Humour. I cannot stress enough how important it is to have a sense of humour and the ability to not taking yourself too seriously.

3. Passion. Whether it is about his job, or his hobbies, or his family or all of the above I need to see his eyes lit up when he talks about it.

4. Natural flow. This may sound corny and all, but, to have a boy with whom I connect almost organically is beyond the best.

5. Pride. It’s so important to me to have a boy who embraces his submissive side and the kinks that come with being submissive. To have a boy who’s proud of the submissive he’s become.

6. Eager to learn. No matter how (in) experienced a boy is, no two dominants are the same. I need to have a boy who’s willing to forget what he’s learned with past partners and start from scratch with me. Let it be clear; Safe, Sane and Consensual lessons are right there, at the beginning of our journey.

7. Porn versus reality. In a time where porn is so accessible, and more than not showcases the more extreme part of everything, it is vital to have a boy who understands that what you see in porn and on Tumblr is not a accurate representation of what a D/s or FLR is. If I feel the boy isn’t able/willing to see the difference we have no future.